Why you should not be friends with an Ex

Why you should not be friends with an Ex, it’s pretty simple – because they are your Ex. Well, at least that’s what it should be but it’s not. Most of us just like to be in contact with our ex, it’s not easy spending a lot of time with someone and then all of a sudden, they are no more.

It’s pretty tough but it has to be done. Trust me I have tried to be friends with an Ex but it never really works out, I just end up getting hurt again! And I have to start all over again. Trust me it’s exhausting. They are exes for a reason; you don’t have to be spiteful towards them, just don’t be in contact or around them. So here are five reasons why it’s a bad idea to be friends with an Ex.

Someone always gets hurt

Yes, someone always gets hurt. The thing is when we break up with our significant other, sometimes the decision is both ways, most times its one-sided. So imagine breaking up when you are not really over that person and the person wants to be friends with you. Of course it would hurt ; especially when you have to see that person move on with someone else.

Maybe a part of you is thinking, you guys might end up together and if this doesn’t happen,you just feel so sad and hurt all over again.

Feel emotions you should be done with if you were not friends

When you break up, you go through a phase of denial and anger – I’m talking about a relationship not a hookup. But if you don’t separate yourself from that ex and didn’t get to have those post breakup feelings while you guys are still friends, you kind of have those feelings and more around them and it’s not healthy.

You lose focus

You know that Steve Harvey’s talk about wanting a new car when the old one is packed in front of your house. Yeah,that is so true; you mind would not be fully over the breakup if your ex is around  and there won’t be room for another guy/lady because a part of him/her will feel you are not over your ex.

You waste time

You waste a lot of time being that person’s “friend”, checking on them, going for coffee with them, checking on their family member, attending weddings, birthdays or funerals. When you should be focused on yourself, moving on and preparing for the next great person.

You never really move on

You never really move on cause you still feel like you are in a relationship ,just not doing intimate stuff anymore (well, some even go as far as being friends with benefit…it doesn’t end well). When I tried being friends with my ex, I ended up getting mad when I see them share a photo on their status or display picture. They would act in a very casual way that it would just make me feel stupid, like I was wasting my time. Sometimes it gets really messy (I block them from my social media), sometimes we get in an argument and not speak with each other anymore.

Therefore my people;If a relationship is over, it should be over. Don’t attach yourself to the person; if you guys somehow randomly meet in a place, say hi politely and move on, don’t try to be friends with them.  Unless you have a kid with them and you know they will always be in your life…but you know what I mean.

Do you think it’s wise to be friends with an ex?  Have you done it?  What was your experience,let us know in the comment section.